Six weeks after I had my first son, Joel, in January 2000 I could barely walk and felt as if I had survived a near-fatal car crash. Both physically and emotionally I felt traumatised by the birth and its aftermath. I had worried during the pregnancy that I might suffer from post-natal depression, having had bouts of anxiety in the past but in fact I didn't - I was fortunate to have huge amounts of support from my husband Simon and my parents and extended family and I adored Joel from the outset. What I hadn't expected was that, a full two years later, I would still be feeling traumatised about the actual birth: continuing flashbacks meant that I could not even contemplate having a routine smear test let alone another baby and was referred for specialist counselling.

Six weeks after I had my second son, Jude in November 2003 I felt absolutely fantastic. Everyone says the second is much easier but before Jude arrived I didn't believe them. I knew what might be in store so I was petrified. Frankly neither birth was exactly a day at the spa but there was no comparison between the two in terms of the care I received.

In Joel's case, I was induced and he was unceremoniously extracted by ventouse at Watford General Hospital by a seemingly endless succession of kind but overworked and overwrought NHS midwives and doctors with me pumped full of drugs - lots of gas, a bit of air, tons of pethidine and a killer of an epidural. Afterwards I was dumped on an empty ward at midnight; my husband was sent home and I didn't see another soul until he returned at 10 the next morning. There was simply no aftercare at all in hospital. I had trouble remembering the names of the numerous community midwives who visited me at home in the days following the birth all giving well-meaning but completely inconsistent advice. I had absolutely no trouble remembering, over and over again, a vision of the registrar in his welly boots and overalls suctioning Joel out and stitching me up in front of a load of students ( the experience must surely have put them all off the profession to judge from the dire shortage of staff in maternity departments these days!). The whole thing was a nightmare which recurred and recurred..................

The counselling helped and we did not want Joel to be a lonely only child so we were delighted when I found that I was expecting Jude. There was no doubt in my mind though that I needed to find a better level of antenatal, natal and postnatal care this time around. By now, we had moved to Hampshire and were extraordinarily lucky to find Lynn and indeed to find her both with a slot in her diary for November and willing to carry out the delivery in hospital - being a slightly anxious type I, of course, wanted to be sure that I was in a place where I could have that epidural if I really needed it. I began to suspect that I might be out of luck, however, when Lynn said she thought I might not be in a position to demand the big needle and that she thought I was "underestimating the power of water as a pain reliever". She was not wrong. I was underestimating it in a big way and I just thought: Lynn doesn't understand and she is really taking this tree-hugging thing a bit too far for my liking. Actually I panicked and burst into tears all over her. Of course, I should have known (as a true Piscean) that the birthing pool at Basingstoke Hospital would be just the thing for me. In the event I hopped gamely (well staggered) into the water with just my tube of gas and air. Lynn wouldn't even let me have any pethidine - although I did ask - several times!!! She didn't say "I told you so" but she had known best as no hard drugs meant I had a natural birth and recovered almost immediately.

Lynn became such a part of the family that we were sad to be discharged. Joel loves her to bits and still talks about her three months on. Jude's birth has allowed me to draw a firm line under the negative experiences of Joel's birth and move on. I have only ever really wanted two children but Lynn has made it possible for me to be able at least to contemplate having a third. Something I would never have dreamed until now. I confess to being a very difficult person to impress and Lynn is one of the most impressive people I have had the good fortune to know. We could not have asked for better, more consistent or comprehensive care than we were given by Lynn and her her wonderful back-up partner Rosie.

Thank you so much for everything Lynn - now and always,

Kim, Simon, Joel and Jude

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